8 tips for parenting in your stepfamily

• Don't force the pace! It takes time for stepfamilies to feel comfortable together.
• Make it safe for the children to talk about their feelings and grieve their losses. Failure to grieve can result in anger and alienation.
• Don't rubbish your 'ex' in front of the children. They want to be loyal to both of you and don't want to take sides.
• Non-resident children need to feel part of the family, not just 'visitors'. Have their school photo, trophies and artistic works on show. Also display photos of your family activities so you can start to build new memories.
• Keep a supply of their favourite toiletries in the bathroom.
• Involve them in family chores. Giving a choice of job helps them to co-operate.
• Remember all teenagers need their own space, friends and activities. They may want to invite a friend when they come to stay.
• Let the birth parent and their child have some time together.

These tips are taken from the Positive Parenting course, 'Time Out for Teenagers'. Find out more about Positive Parenting courses at www.parenting.org.uk or call
0845 643 1939. Positive Parenting is now part of
Care for the Family.

Making memories and creating family traditions
To get some fresh ideas for building family traditions and making memories with your family, take a look at www.careforthefamily.org.uk/memorable-moments