How the online world impacts grief

But there are also downsides, and as technology changes we need to be mindful of how it affects us as we grieve.

Here Jane Park, one of our Bereaved Parent Support Coordinators, explores this and shares some of her own experiences.

Is it really helpful?

For those of us who are grieving, we can often feel bewildered, scared and alone. It can seem like those around us don’t know how to help and can’t really identify with us, no matter how good their intentions.

There are plenty of support groups and charities out there and being able to find out about them in just a few clicks is so helpful. We can also research theories about grief or read about other people’s experiences which can help put our minds at ease.

However, as with everything we come across online, we need to try and use common sense to find the support which is safe and well-structured.

Is social media helpful?

My social media feed is dominated by posts about grief and loss, no doubt because of how the algorithms work.

This can be comforting – it reassures me that I am not alone, I latch on to other people’s experiences that are similar to my own and I can empathise.

With a reduced attention span, which is common when grieving, a short video clip may be just what I want to see.

It can even give me an outlet to express my emotions and have a good cry! Surely that’s a good thing?

Well, it can be… in moderation.

For all of us, whether we are grieving or not, it can be so easy lose hours on social media. Grieving is draining at the best of times so if I find myself immersed in other people’s grief, it can trigger my own and become completely overwhelming and exhausting.

The endless scroll can also cause me to lose perspective and forget that there is hope!

If you find yourself feeling like that or if social media is causing you to feel worse in any way, try limiting how much time you are spending on it and find something positive that recharges you instead.

Is AI helpful?

We could write a whole article just on this expanding field of technology! I think it’s too soon to say if it will have any benefit when we’re grieving but approach with caution.

What was once the stuff of science fiction has become reality as AI can now be used to represent the person we’ve lost.

This may be done with the best of intentions, but it can never bring our loved one back and may blur the lines of reality and even delay the process of grieving.

It is a natural desire to maintain continuing bonds and many of us take great comfort in photographs, videos and holding onto things that were precious to our loved one, but AI has the power to create an alternative reality which can become all-consuming.

Try and consider whether it’s helpful or not and let’s keep connected with those around us and with the natural world.

We will never forget our loved ones but part of the work of grief is to build a new normal which can be full and even joyful again. It’s best not to do this behind a screen or in a virtual world.